Archive for the hen night Category

and again…..

Posted in blogging, creative / writing, glasgow, hen night, me and my world, morecambe, wedding on July 24, 2007 by Khlari

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The Bride and Groom…Berni attempting to chop Gary’s hand off…….(well, she didn’t say that, but….)

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This is the real M______- stealing Becca’s champagne (about right for my small monster……..)

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This doesn’t seem to like posting more than one picture at once…here you can see the strange hat-thing, and M_____ who looked a deceptively innocent pretty in pink. It was FREEEZING on Saturday, we almost died of hypothermia up at the memorial, (it’s the highest point in town….) only to have to dash back to Morecambe to get Mr A’s mum’s inhaler (which she had forgotten)…then back to the hotel, where Mr A decided he REALLY didn’t like me like that (scary was the word he used), so goaded me on til we went back home again to goth up…(true, I did feel more comfortable, but……) M____ insisted on gothing up too, so we made our entrance like the Addams family!

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Welcome to musingsofkhlari.co.uk!

Posted in blogging, creative / writing, glasgow, hen night, me and my world, morecambe, wedding on July 24, 2007 by Khlari

Wahay! I have a domain! Gosh that looks clever and technical and stuff! (Good job I have the lovely AmethystDragon then….I wouldn’t have known what to do about it!!!!!)…tee hee

Here are some more wedding pics……

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(me and Mr A looking bizarrely normal….)

Health Warning- Normality Strikes…..#2

Posted in birthday, blogging, Child Protection, Divorce, hen night, me and my world, morecambe, wedding on July 23, 2007 by Khlari

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Yep, this one is indeed very scary-pastelled to near-oblivion (Mr A said he didn’t like it- apparently I didn’t look like me). Quite frightening…..

Health Warning- Normality Strikes…..

Posted in blogging, books, creative / writing, Divorce, France, glasgow, hen night, international family law, me and my world, morecambe, wedding on July 23, 2007 by Khlari

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Shade your eyes, it’s shocking.

It was THE wedding this weekend, and as usual it was mayhem in our house. We had 12 people in the house most of the weekend, as even Berni stayed the night befor the wedding……Friday was a headless chicken day where I seemed to get nothing done at all, there were endless catastrophes, things not arriving, getting lost, I mislaid the false nails I had carefully purchased (as I alone of all the women couldn’t afford to do the beauty parlour/hairdresser thing on the morning of the wedding, I had to make do with doing my own hair (complex), make-up (scary, but fortunately not tangerine-coloured), and resort to stick-on nails from Claire’s Accesssories which I was left with 5 minutes to put on…….) It was a mad weekend (and for some reason this is only letting me post one photo at a time……

 

 

….Anyone for a bit of Elastoplast Bondage?

Posted in blogging, creative / writing, Dr Who, hen night, manchester, me and my world, morecambe, travel, wedding on July 19, 2007 by Khlari

Frantic, Fiendish, and Frankly knackering. This week, that is. Work has been hideously busy and I haven’t stopped. Weekend in Stockport was fun though. Got there on Saturday with Mr A and M____, then we all including Sal and Ali, went to see the Dr Who exhibition in Manchester, which was frankly…pants. Cost us £26.00, and contained a few costumes from the last series, with lots of strobe lighting, and then deposited the kids neatly in the middle of the shop. So that was a bit annoying to say the least. Back to sunny Stockport, then we went out for a drink with some old friends from our Drama group back in Stockport- some of them I hadn’t seen for 16 years or so, and one was an ex-boyfriend…. Mr A in hysterics at this, thought it was even funnier when Sal and I revealed that we had both been out with him. Shall we say that he’s changed a bit in the meantime……his mum and dad came out to, who I always got on really well with……

Then we all went off to Stockport’s answer to an alternative pub, The Thatched House. It was great, they had a punk band playing and a nice beer garden where you could smoke-which is why almost everyone was in the garden. Some of our friends had however become a little straight over the years, were wearing ‘smart casual’ (they nearly didn’t get in…) and looked frankly shocked at being taken to such a place. Several pints later and one of them, B_____ came round to our way of thinking to sauch a point that he was telling anyone who would listen that he ‘liked a nice woman in fishnet’. I think I made a convert. Mind you as Sal remarked (whilst looking at me)- “a bit of fishnet, a PVC skirt and this lot turn into a Brian Rix farce…..”

This week has been mad mad mad at work. Mad at home too as it’s countdown to the wedding. The house is full of Mr A’s family, Giana is up and having to remake half the bridesmaids dresses as the hideously expensive wedding dress shop messed up, Mr A is sulking as he doesn’t want to wear the suit Berni chose, and I am psyching myself up to the mental trauma of a weekend in pastels (well, a floaty 50s type Monsoon dress in lavender with silver beading…..and a silver shrug)

This is my hat, a fascinator-thingy to perch on my hair, which I’m planning to make into BIG hair…. The wedding is taking over. M____ behaving like total prima donna and having to parade around house in pink frock and shiny things. Giana has christened Berni ‘Bridezilla’. Mr A in giant sulk. I still have to finish off bits of my outfit….(which might be a good idea) in between making thousands of tiny bonbonniere labels (have finished those now…)

To top it all the physio I’m seeing for my back decided it needed strapping up with a strange kind of elastoplast affair, so it looks like some kind of amateur sticky-tape bondage for beginners. Oh, and it’s agony, as it makes me sit up straight and use muscles I forgot I had…sleeping nigh-on impossible because as soon as I curl, it hurts.OWWWWWWWWWW! It’s supposed to improve my posture. Thank goddess I can take it off tomorrow, as the frock for the wedding is strapless……that would look elegant!

Weekend kind of started list night…all round to Berni’s for an insane cocktail night…except I had to work today, so had to go home early and relatively sober…..which was most unfair as everyone else was slaughtered. They shall remain nameless in case they are reading this! lol! but I’m off tomorrow!!! Yay! Pass me that cocktail shaker. It will ease the pain, honest…

Bela Lugosi’s Toenails!

Posted in blogging, books, child kidnapping, creative / writing, Dalston, employment, family law, France, glasgow, gothic, hen night, international family law, london, Marie Lloyd, me and my world, meme, migraines, morecambe, movies, music, music hall, pagan, penguins, Rocky Horror, Sylvia Plath, travel, werewolves vampires and ghoulies, work/life balance on June 14, 2007 by Khlari

I am going to steal an idea from SurlyGirl here. Have you ever noticed on your feeds how people have come to your blog through arcane google searches?

Think about the penguins. Those penguins gave me more readers than I could have dreamed of. Surly Girl’s experience was about Sarah Beeny’s tits……Therefore I am going to make the rest of this post up with arcane statements and see how many more bizarre readers I get through mentioning them…….

Let’s see….

Ditta von Teese’s bellybutton maybe. That might be a good one. Or maybe with the penguin theme…..Penguin kinky sex.

What about Pagan Penguin Perversion probably get three hits for the price of one on that one.

Dragons seem to get lots of hits on mine too. Lets use Dragon Penguin Morecambe Hussy. From the last couple of days we could have Victorian Cauldron Gestapo Frida Kahlo. Or Pentacle Penguin Happy Fairy. Or Gothic London Penguin Post. Maybe Marie Lloyd Mabon Billy Bragg.

Frequent ones are Gothic, Fairy, Penguin, Pagan…..but some of them it is honestly unfathomable how they get to me. Maybe this could rival googlewhacking- with the person who gets the most hits from the most bizarre things winning?

Champagne Cocktails, Transport Cock-ups, Tiaras, and the Shanghai Shuffle…..the misadventures of a wild weekend #2

Posted in blogging, creative / writing, glasgow, hen night, london, me and my world, morecambe, music, pagan on June 6, 2007 by Khlari

Where did I get to? Oh yes, bawling out the hits at Shanghai Shuffle. Made a complete idiot of myself, as did the whole place! But it was very good fun. very nice cocktails, I was obliged to drink ‘Pretty in Pink’ ones all night to co-ordinate with my outfit…..(that’s my excuse). Then we went off in search of somewhere else to go. Wandered up and down Sauchiehall Street, trying to find somewhere still open, and Giana was struggling a bit as she’s on crutches…….

Finally decided that the hotel had a bar, so had to go there and demolish even more champagne……and Drambuie. Finally got to bed after Bernie had decided to ring Mr A at 3 am and heavy-breathe at him. His response- ‘Bernadette, do you have asthma?’ Finally to bed at about 4am……

Crawled out of bed and had an enormous breakfast, then off to Central Station for a train……here goes my train jinx again.

We had to get a train to Carlisle, wait a bit, then on to a place called Hellifield (none of us even knew where that was), then finally Lancaster. Five hours. Had to ring Mr A to tell him to come and get me straight from the station……

Carlisle was shut. Literally. Bang went all hope of a cup of tea. Then they tried to convince us to go by bus to Lancaster…(No- not on a Sunday thanks.) On to Hellifield over the Settle and Carlisle line, supposedly one of the most beautiful train lines in the world. We were a little to frazzled to notice as we stopped at all of the 13 stops en route….to Hellifield.

Which turned out to be in North Yorkshire, so we were only about 30 miles from Leeds…some detour.

Finally got to Lancaster, then in the car and Mr A had to drive me down to London. Took ages even to get the other side of Preston. Then going fine till we hit near monsoon the other side of Northampton. Didn’t arrive till 11.30 as then had to drive at 30mph, couldn’t see anything.

M________ really pleased to see us and disgustingly spoilt and brown after weekend at hideous family reunion.

Monday morning, Mr A went on a mission, to buy an OTT African wedding suit…and he did. It’s red and black with a long zoot-suit like jacket, and he is seriously in love with it. Wouldn’t be too bad but I have to be with him when he wears it……… Then he topped it all by buying a t-shirt with 50s bathing beauties on it. I despair. He seems to like the OTT clothes in Hackney, why did I take him???? I now have to walk down the street with a goth pirate in a zoot suit.

Then back to Lancaster. OK, Mr A had to drive, and we didn’t get home til 7pm after his shopping spree. So in one weekend I have done the equivalent of a return trip from London to Glasgow with detours. Now need a holiday to get over it all.